this life is a journey.

today is thanksgiving. im sitting down in my room all by myself, after helping my mom cook. i cant fight this feeling in my stomach. its in knots. the holidays have always been beautiful and they still are, of course. but im scared.

thanksgiving, christmas, new years, my birthday, ...... the list goes on. how am i supposed to do this without you?.... you were supposed to be here. with me.

im sad. and i need to get over it. today is a day of thanks. and im thankful, really. but i didnt expect today to be so grieving to me. i cant help but fake a smile today... maybe i wont have to fake it the whole time... but i will literally have to "fake it til you make it" today.

i dont have much to say. my heart is in pieces today. my stomach is in knots. my head is a mess. and my face shows.


today, im thankful for grace to get through it all. because i know i will.